A Good Day

Something unexpected, a little surprise amidst calm of a veiled July morning.  Hearing the lion dance at the temple like it is just outside, sound travels. Watching it chin cupped on my window sill, and The Centre when I look up. Turning around and seeing the apartment, wow, I live here. Turning back with breeze against my cheek and it's lovely. Feeling like part of the fabric of this Hong Kong, today.

Lament Of The Hong Kong House-Hunter*

When your apartment is 400-odd square feet, you let the outside in once you open the windows, since there’s not much of “in” to be held up against.

Which leaves Hong Kong dwellers with 2 options:

• Live someplace where you love the outside of
• Never open the windows (the more common option)

I chose No.1, which when combined with other requirements such as a 5-ft bed (a Malaysian not Hong Kong standard I’m told), the need to live on the Island due to lack of written Chinese literacy, white walls and kitchen/toilet which live up to “expat-ations”, and the aversion to paying Damansara Height rental prices, left me with few options.

4 options to be exact. Out of the 1.4 mil private residential units** in Hong Kong. Okay I exaggerate. I only looked at 45, not 1.4 mil apartments and that was when I first arrived in 2011, none the wiser about neighbourhoods and the true definition of racecourse views (a crack as broad as your index finger) and what 300 sq ft really means (standing up from your toilet sitting position to wash hands at the basin).

Armed with the superiority of this knowledge, I set forth courageously two years later in search of a possible alternative, after being somewhat unceremoniously 20% upped on rental by my landlady (on whatsapp, in 8 words). This time I said, it will be better. I will be better.

This time, I found 3. I only looked at 15, so arguably it was an improvement percentage-hit wise. But it was still sufficiently depressing to trigger a bout of ihatehongkongitis for the past 6 weeks, from under which cloud I am only emerging now, with the help of excellent bars and eclectic neighbours.

The problem with the Hong Kong housing market in my opinion, can be summarised as such:

1. There are not enough apartments.***
2. The mainlanders are rich, and the government is greedy.
3. The landlords are greedy, and the range of tenants is too wide and varied (from expats to dirt poor locals, and locals to dirt poor expats), resulting in a situation of a pot for every cover, and so many pots you never thought could/would exist beyond a Malaysian understanding of what an “acceptable” apartment is.

Anyway, the happy ending of this story is that I extended my lease with an 8% increment, due to reasons I cannot explain other than my landlady changed her mind about the ever-elusive reasons behind the Hong Kong rental “market” rate, which to me is a moot point anyway (see point 1 above).

Or it could be she found my long sulking (5 weeks) then sob story of poor developing country person sufficiently entertaining, or simply tired of the bargaining game she was playing (my local colleagues tell me this).

Either way I am glad, because I love my apartment and neighbourhood. It’s one of those places that makes you happy to stay in or step out the door, from the antique shops you feel you need to approach with respect, to cloud-watching from the couch, and the fruit sellers (from really kind to real rip-offs) who initially do not look different at all. I love its alleys and corners, old businesses and new ventures, juxtaposed in a way that highlights Hong Kong’s heartbreaking transience just so.

It’s one of the oldest spots in this country, where you see locals and foreigners alike adapt, settle and try to thrive in a new landscape. And die too, as it is near a row of coffin shops. Its distinction I make from funeral homes, because that would be scary. In short, somewhere I could call a home away from home.

Am I a Hong Konger now? No. I will always be Malaysian, hopefully with a little more game and a little more worldliness with a little help from my friends. Will I renegotiate the rental down the next time the market dips?

You bet-lah.

* also posted on www.curasian.com
** http://www.gov.hk/en/about/abouthk/factsheets/docs/housing.pdf
*** http://www.cbre.eu/portal/pls/portal/res_rep.show_report?report_id=2305

Questions to Ponder When You’re Halfway Between an Empty Glass and a Full One*

Some confusing things about Life.

• If comfort zones are not good for us, why do we feel so good in them?
• If people are meant to be the same, why were we made different?
• If the path of least resistance leads downhill, why does going with the flow sometimes bring the best results?
• Why is it that even when you are happy where you are, you have to be in motion just to remain still?
• If babies knew everything innately, why are we born helpless, having to learn everything from others, only to have to unlearn them for ourselves later?

All these things confuse me, and to be frank they still do. But one day I thought; What if, the human lesson is not so much that the glass is half full, but that it can only be half full when the other half is empty?

Perhaps then, when bad or upsetting things happen, being indignant is fruitless, since indignation implies that these things should not have happened when of course, they did and will continue to do so.

If it all evens out in the end, why then, do we bother fighting for anything? It’s a valid question, and helps me understand and feel more kindly towards those who seem to never fight for anything.

But I guess the question we need to ask ourselves is not whether we should fight, but at what cost. After all, while time is infinite, it’s finite for us, and generally things that won’t matter in 5 minutes, don’t matter at all. Which also means that, for things which will matter for more than 5 minutes, we fight for. No matter how far it is out of our comfort zones, how different it looks from what we know, how uphill the battle, how happy we think we are, and despite what we have been told.

1. Electoral reform
2. Defending the urban vote
3. Rural involvement
4. Education and security

2013-2018. Here we go.

* also posted on www.curasian.com

Sobre a mesa sob a janela da escola, há queijo, manteiga e um garfo

I am in Portugal and messing around translating words with my colleague, which I do sometimes and find immensely fun. Came across this link and found that if I spoke in Malay, I could be understood (albeit horrible grammar) in at least 10 different languages! See, I could:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Malay_loanwords

Be matter-of-fact in Tamil: "The lion ate the mango in the curry"

Be dramatic and suggestive in Sanskrit: "This pomegranate is a blessing from my angel, and I will eat it despite danger of punishment!"

Read the news in Portugese: "According to the firefighters, there was a pail and lace on the bench, and a flag and violin in the cupboard" (my colleague confirms this is right)

Feign modesty in Mandarin: "A teacup-full is enough, but I recommend you use the scales to weigh it"

Be modest in Hokkien: "Share my rice vermicelli and chives cake, we can sit by the drain and drink black tea"

Begin a geographically inclusive statement in Iban: "Our Continent..."

Suggest an ingredient in Hindi: "Lady-finger?"

Be boring in English: "Let's have a biscuit in the garage during computer class"

Be serious like the Dutch: "Ah, the book of Risk" (lights a cigarette)

Be in Arabic, either other-worldly and instructive "On Sunday and Thursday, there is a sermon on world philosophy, so come to the mosque and not the laboratory" or just right "O we are thankful for snow, giraffes and soap"


So ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, this is why we learn Bahasa Malaysia. Not because it's a language that no one really uses out of Malaysia and Indonesia (you think anyone uses Dutch, even the Dutch?) but because it's fun, shows us where we are from and who passed through our lands and lives before us, and reminds us of the wonderful, quirky people we are.


Tamil: "Singa itu makan mangga dalam gulai"
Sanskrit: "Buah delima ini bagaikan anugerah dari bidadari saya, dan akan saya mencubanya sungguhpun ada bahaya dan denda!"
Portugese: "Menurut pasukan bomba, di atas bangku ada baldi dan renda, di dalam almari ada bendera dan biola"
Mandarin: "Satu cawan sudah cukup, tetapi saya syorkan anda menggunakan dacing untuk menimbangnya"
Hokkien: "Kongsi saya punya bihun dan kuih kucai, kita boleh duduk di tepi longkang minum Teh O"
Iban: “Benua kita...”
Hindi: “Bendi?”
English: “Mari makan biskut di garaj semasa kelas komputer”
Dutch: “Ah, buku Risiko” (sambil menyalakan rokok)
Arabic: "Pada hari Ahad dan Khamis, datang ke masjid dan bukan makmal untuk dakwah falsafah” dan “O, kita perlu bersyukur kerana adanya salji, zirafah dan sabun”

Asian

The sum of the many parts of Asia, while it means certain common things, comprises so much diversity. Newcomers to the region ask me - how are these different, what are the people like?

I can only tell of the places I have been, and of these, what I love the most, so I say:

• Vietnamese: their sense of self, and general absence of bullshit in getting things done
  


• Japanese: their quiet resolve to be themselves, and keep their ways
  


• Indonesians: these guys are just cool
  


• Filipinos: their patience, and ability to laugh almost always
  


• Koreans: their soft little centers, beneath that tough, but really just rather honest exterior
  


• Cambodians: a gentleness, despite the obvious toil needed for survival
  


• Singaporeans: Malaysian roots are a redeeming factor. Only joking - discipline I guess, essential for progress
  


• Hong Kongers: a keen quick-wittedness and ability to land on their feet
  


• Thais: politeness, and the innate eye for things beautiful
  


• Malaysians: You tell me, but I guess I love most about us our simplicity and tolerance of people as people
  

I don't say these traits are perfect, or without challenge, but to me they carry the strength of the people. Go Asia! The world is ours for the taking.

Friday Prayer

Guide my hands
Guide my heart
Guide my mind
And guide my guard.

Keep me clear
To always see
The things I hold
Dear to me.

Trial and temptation*
Are the human condition
And the result of that
Is so much crap

Monkeys, sharks, wolves and monsters
Cloaks and daggers, all real terrors
Please guide my way
In dealing with that.

I don’t know how You do it all
Everyone’s wants
Clash and overlap, afterall.
But I’ve been told I overthink

So I’m going to stop that right now.

Fill my life,
With things that matter
Help me catch on,
To these things faster.

Help me find
My very own bliss
And contribute to that of
Those I love and cherish

Help me be wise
Faithful and strong
To be the person I knew
I was all along.

* Good Omens - Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman

Cheers (I’ll Drink to That)*

When there is noise, and it is time to watch your back, it is not easy to judge those around you. Support can be a fleeting and changeable thing. But I am grateful for the simple and un-obligatory gestures– a suitcase dragged across apartment blocks, a head’s up over a bowl of noodles. The time spent to lend an ear, share experience, and give sincere advice. I am typically detached, and did not think of these things as important, but I have learnt that they are. Thank goodness, there are things to be thankful for in rubbish situations. *almost Rihanna

Big Pictures

You know – the earthquake in Japan, which caused the lives of over 10,000 people, destroyed homes, belongings and whole families, also resulted in the Earth spinning faster- by a grand total of 0.0000018 seconds. Imagine – in the big picture of the planet, something that massive only caused that minute an effect.

But imagine also, the impact of such devastation on each individual who is (no pun intended) on eye-level with the storm – this is probably the worst thing that could happen to you.

It is maybe the same for every person who dies in a war and their families, or anyone who at some point realised we are all cogs in a very, very, big machine.

Well guess what, what a special cog we each are, even if only to ourselves and the lives we touch. Perhaps the idea is to aspire towards the biggest picture we can have of ourselves, and keep in mind that despite all, it is still part of a bigger picture out there. It will be okay, and if it isn’t, there is room to make it better.

Maya Angelou also said

''I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands, you need to be able to throw something back".

I like the Man Mo Temple in Hong Kong. There, you worship both the God of Culture and the Martial God. Which makes sense because sometimes, even the most civil must fight. So if fight we must, may we have guidance that it be in the highest order of ways.

Perhaps I'm a little serious but...

These days, I discovered that people do a lot to get to know one another. And it seems that there are no rules, except those in your head. A boy on vacation hooks up with a stewardess on a flight in from somewhere, and tries to convince her to fly out to see him at home the next week. A girl calls a married colleague in the middle of the night to complain about a date he recommended which didn’t work out.

Increasingly, boundaries are set only by the two people in a connection with each other. And because boundaries are set independent of any norms, so is the definition of overstepping them. Forget then right and wrong, these become even grayer.

Perhaps, the only constant is that every connection between two people is a balance of power. And the idea is to keep the upper hand to protect, or win the things that personally matter. Even in relationships where there is love, faith, and trust? Maybe, I don’t know.

As for things getting out of hand, I also don’t know. Perhaps “Laissez faire et laissez passer” (let do, and let pass)* is already the inevitable. I’d like to think "Laissez faire et laissez passer, le monde va de lui même!" (let do, and let pass, the world goes on by itself!)* is more reassuring, there is a feeling that there will always be some correction or adjustment to balance, down the road. Still, this is scary stuff.

*Wikipedia

How we are strong

I resolved to pen more thoughts this year, even fleeting ones, so here.

In scattered entries throughout this blog, we have established that time and energy in each day is finite, and it is how one spends that resource which determines the outcome of next day, and the days to come. Simple.

In our education, there is a lot of time and energy spent on following a program of learning new information, and getting appraised at the end of the process. This is school, and typically, that is what schools are meant for. That is fine.

Probably, what is not fine is the lack of realization that 1. equal time and energy should be invested in clearly identifying one’s strengths and weaknesses, and 2. those said strengths and weaknesses are sometimes, but hardly effectively reflected by the results of the said school appraisal.

This is not a new concept, yet there are many who consider their 20s as a time of self-discovery, I not excluded – and I just wished mine could have begun earlier.

Because in the real world where summits shift, and not much is linear, it is the intimate knowledge of one’s strengths and weaknesses, passions and dislikes, which will guide personal strategy, sanity, and ultimate survival.

Yes, it is an evolving process, much of which is earned from experience and years, but I believe the sooner one is able to begin to describe oneself, if only to themselves, the more powerful that person will be.

The New Year

What a confused entry below. Well, it is fitting considering it got somewhat confusing towards the end of last year. And you know, it still is.

Anyhow, it is nice to feature something I am not confused about. Adibah Amin's As I Was Passing is an outstanding offering of Malaysiana. Beyond that, she and I do have some thoughts in common, and when weary to write, it is encouraging and comforting to find someone who has been there, and said it before.


Good 2011 to you all!

Places

Nothing like a Swatch to remind you about the passing of time – it ticks so loud.

As a child I did not spend more than 3 years living in the same city or town. And although some say adolescence is the most formative time of one’s life, I never quite lost the wanderlust from my childhood years of exploring the vibe of a brand new place, and inhaling the scent of possibilities only fresh paint in an empty house can offer.

I “incubated” in Petaling Jaya during my teenage years and cannot say I enjoyed it too much. One year in Sydney introducing me to myself, then it was back to base camp. I call it such because the next 8 years (man, that is a big number) was and is one big old fschiwizz of travels – 37 places and 16 countries, each experience alternately wonderful, lonesome, insightful, intimidating and peaceful in itself.

These opportunities come from work. I’ve been fortunate to get the corporate version of a Globe Trekker job. And to digress, I love how equalizing work can be. Hairdressing in Hong Kong is no different from hairdressing in Manila or anywhere else – a good cut is a good cut. Not much gives me more satisfaction than seeing a Malaysian working alongside and holding their own with people from different, more developed countries, I’ll be honest. For me, that is through playing in a field with rules and people from different places, and making it, on the books, and in my way.


Jalan-Jalan (I’m just travelling around)

I love traveling. Despite immigration and suitcases, I do. This I realized when standing in Amsterdam's airport at 5.30 am after a 13 hour flight, teeth un-brushed and slightly bleary eyed looking for the next connection, and I am inexplicably happy. I think it had something to do with spotting Ronald McDonald with that congenial arm draped around an airport bench, familiarity mixed up with adventure, like making a friend of an acquaintance you clicked well with before.

Some places will always feel a little bit like home – Kuala Lumpur, Sydney, Antwerp. Some feel like I never knew them in past lives but have the maiden chance to start now – Busan, Bangkok, Tokyo. And some, I’ll just be passing through.

Being loyal to a place for me is similar to being loyal to someone. If it is the right person, it is not highs all the time but there are wonderful moments that keep you nourished, and despite the work and rough times there is a kind of peace from feeling that you are in the right place. And if it’s the wrong guy, it is suffocating and draining despite all the getting by.

Yet, at some point we all need to get past the second date, the second year, yes? I guess what you earn for accepting the ugliness alongside with the light is your own furniture, and your own someone to come home to. We reap what we sow. Good thing is, we can make our own rules and do it on our own terms, but we reap what we sow.

Getting acquainted with Antwerp

Apparently this city lies at the crossroads of five international motorways, linking the Netherlands, Germany and France. Bergen op Zoom where I work is a speedy 30 minutes away, and Maxis sends me texts every morning when I cross the border, to tell me to enjoy my time in the Netherlands, and not to worry as I can call the Malaysian embassy at +31703506506 if I need to .

I love how urban it is here. It is classic and beautiful like so many European towns, but there is size, scope and enough trash on the street to make a city a city.

It feels a little like Sydney. It reminds me of how much I relish walking a city, disappear in it, discover it at my pace and make it my own.

I will make you a Bo Bunh

One sunny day in Lausanne, I decide I would visit Dalat for dinner.

Tripadvisor highly recommends it so I take a cab, 10 minutes up slopes and into apartment suburbia.

I sit outdoors in a corner between the wall and the other side of the door, and a nice man hands me a menu in French, as most things are here. I don’t recognize the words but I smell something wonderful coming from the kitchen.

I suspect he is the owner, a French man who married a Vietnamese lady, and we gesture to each other that I don’t read but what is that cooking? Do I speak Vietnamese? No. Chinois, anyone? No. He decides to take me to the kitchen where I am introduced to a petite Asian lady with kind eyes.

For some reason, I am so happy to see her and I have a huge grin on my face when I tell her I am from Malaisie and could I please order what is cooking? Apparently there are several things cooking. After some back and forth, she tells me, she will make me a bo bunh. Her eyes tell me, with the confidence of a mother who knows what is good for you, this is what you want.

That settled, the one who I think is the husband takes me to choose my drink. He shows me the interior of the dark cooler and all its possibilities. I take a sugared green tea, which he makes a show of swirling in a wine glass and letting me try. I love this couple already.

The bo bunh comes – a bowl of vermicelli topped with beef sautéed in onions, spring rolls, carrots, beansprouts, peanuts and coriander. It is a hearty serving, yet I realize as I look at it that I am going to finish every last scrap. And I do. I take my time, for it is so good and so authentic that it makes me understand how food can be restorative, even remind a person of who he or she is.

These two people will never know the kindness they offered a homesick girl in a foreign land simply by being themselves and cooking good food. I am truly grateful.

2nd time around

"Maybe I'd gone up twelve stories, then down three. Maybe I'd circled the globe. How would I know?
- Murakami -

Although there's nothing like being in a place for the first time, I say sometimes coming back is even sweeter.

Sydney after 7 years, and Amsterdam just about two, it's good to see you again.

Actually, it is Simple

When things are going well, be grateful.
When things are not going well, don't worry.

Euro-Asia

Where “privacy” and “personal space” are still buzzwords for some living in Asia, these here are requirements as basic as breathing, existence unfathomable without.

Where watching, gauging and measuring before speaking are valued as strengths, these may be a handicap here.

Strength, built from self-possession and individualism, pit against fluid power gained from years of tolerating and standing in the shoes of others.

A million other things, none right or wrong, just as different as apples are from oranges.

How is it we are so exhaustingly different? And how do we achieve more common ground?

Be it as Neil Gaiman said “If only experience could be endowed without experience”, surely we will be enriched by these times, but the currents of give and take make trying teachers.

The Dropdown List

How is it that sometimes things are said quite eloquently?

“Because of the rat race, a lot of us have been pushed into studying something that would give us security for life”.
– Scarlette of Core Design Gallery, Timeout KL April 2010 –

If you were a post-secondary / college student in Malaysia in the late 90s, instead of “I want to be ___”, your career decision may likely have been influenced by “I will select from the below list”, which looked something like this:

1. Accountant
2. Engineer
3. Doctor
4. Banker
5. Lawyer
6. IT (no designations because to be honest at the time, no one really knew what it was, other than IT was the next big thing)
7. Pharmacist
8. I am struggling to even come up with more

Call it realities of capitalism, the developing country, or the arguable conservatism/foresight of parents who want the best for their children, there is no wrong or right. I do hope though, that we are moving towards an environment where individuals from more professions can find their choices equally rewarding in practical and personal aspects, so long as they do their jobs well.

To fill that blank myself, I might have said….anthropologist. What about you?

Discussion with an atheist

Today a colleague of mine told me that spirits cannot exist in the same realm that we do, simply because the world would then be overpopulated. I told him that unlike real people, probably more than one spirit can sit in the same chair, so really they wouldn’t take up so much space.

This is the math grad who believes that there is no God (in the context of the bible, at least) because given the proven time that photosynthesis takes, the world could not have been created in 7 days. I don’t argue with that, but then, I haven’t read the bible.

Anyway, he counters by saying that even if this were true, at some point, we would still run out of room because think of the multitude of spirits we must have through time since the creation of man (being from Hong Kong, he is very concerned about space and population control. Being Malaysian, I am a little more easygoing about real estate in general).

Why then I say, that is exactly why we have reincarnation. Same soul, re-born into a different body that lives through a different time. At some point, perhaps that soul might move on to somewhere beyond, and there will be room for a new one here and there. Everyone/thing else in between, is what we accountants would just call timing differences.

Hey I don’t have all the answers, but mathematically it seems to make good sense, no?